Today I leave for Thailand for a little under 7 months. Needless to say I have had quite a few breakdowns, concerns and freak outs. I'm not as prepared as I should be, and let's be honest have no idea what I'm doing.
Maybe I should back up a bit and start over...
I got TESOL/TEFL certified to teach English back in 2012. It was not long after my dad passed away and I had the "holy crap life is short, I should see the world" moment. I have always been interested in teaching, I majored in education for 2 years in college. And I wanted to travel the world, so why not combine the two? I didn't love my job at the time and it just seemed like the time to do it. Then I found out my mom was sick. I kept putting off taking this opportunity because of my family and other priorities. I thought this would always be around. Know that I am not complaining about having to put this off. I never would have traded it for the time I was able to spend with my mom, and the other trips I took.
Fast forward to this year, I had a new job I wasn't crazy about, recently been broken up with out of the blue... As good a time as ever for a new adventure. I essentially crash my friend's vacation with her friends (don't worry there will be another blog about that one), but before doing so I applied for teaching jobs in Thailand. I honestly didn't think it would all happen as quickly as it did. While in Europe I was offered 3 positions and ended up taking one teaching kindergarten in a city called Sing Buri. Now I have to go home and pack up my life in 10 days to get there in time with the current schedule of my Euro trip. I end up leaving Europe two and a half weeks early to sort out my life.
Once I'm home I begin packing up my apartment, which luckily I don't have to break my lease for moving out early. My fantastic roommate, Lauren, is having her boyfriend move in so we are just switching on the lease. Check! Now we need need a bigger storage unit, My sister, brother in law and I share a unit for things from our mom's house and our childhood. But now I'll need to move my apartment into it so bigger is definitely needed. Luckily I find one in a few days, I check it out and after signing the new lease start moving what I can from the old smaller unit. With help from my family we move the remaining items.
I continue to pack, get all the shots that I need (I think it totaled to 7 ugh), stock up on all the medications and contacts I will need over there. I would rather not chance it and want to have everything if possible.
Obviously, amidst all this nonsense I just happen to meet an awesome, funny and sweet guy. Definitely pulled an Erin there. Oh, hi, you're wonderful, ok well I'm moving to the other side of the planet, maybe see you in 7 months, bye! If you could only see the eyes that are rolling right now. Needless to say this makes leaving a little bit harder, but he was supportive of my trip, and I don't regret a second of it!
So the day before I leave I go out to eat with friends and then plan to go out that night downtown. We get Thai, I figure so I will have had a recent meal to compare home and Thailand's cooking. I end up being surprised by my aunt and uncle after my sneaky sister sets it up. Along with the help of my roommate and her boyfriend they pull it off fantastically! After visiting with them we head to the bar where my other friends are and we celebrate my crazy plans and it ends up being a lot of fun and not too messy of an evening.
Cut back to me slightly crying, panicking, and debating if this was a good idea or not. Then that moment of calm realization. I am going to Thailand. I am doing what I have been wanting to do for 4 years. Life has been constantly crazy, and this is something I have put off over and over again. It is finally happening. Resume panic and racing thoughts:
Am I prepared for this? It has been 4 years since I had the training class... Will I remember everything they taught me?
Will I be good at this? I know kids and can usually handle them, but the actual teaching part? Can I do this without messing up these children?
Will I fail? What will my friends and family think if I fail and come home early?
The real question that I fight off because it is never the fun or happy question... Would my parents be proud of me for doing this?
Hell yes they would. My mom especially, because she told me to do it.
If I fail, I come home early and can say I gave it a shot. I was brave enough to put myself out there. I will have moved across the planet to try something I had never done before. How many people can say that have ever done that?
There was still the obvious fear that still lingers.
My biggest concern is that this has happened so quickly I have not done any real research on Thailand. I am essentially going to this country flying blind. I know that the King has passed away and the country is in mourning. That is about it. I have never been so ill prepared before... Oh wait, there was that time I went to Australia for 3 months with absolutely no plan...
I'm excited, terrified, curious, doubtful, happy and sad. I have to catch my flight to JFK, connect in Taipei and finally arrive in Bangkok. FIngers crossed everything goes smoothly and that my contacts with my company show up and I'm good to go!
Update... apparently I have to have a return flight to be able to leave the USA. Jet Blue let me make one up, but China Airlines wouldn't let me board the plane without a return flight. Que a $700 random flight purchase... lets hope I don't have to buy any other huge purchases to be able to get there!
